Reading can be a powerful source of relaxation or stress. While the opportunity can create shared smiles, caring touch and emotion, the process is a work-in-progress for some children. For example, caregivers may expect children to sit compliantly and in a state of awe. The caregiver may prefer reading books from front to back. The child may, however, prefer turn to a favorite page or want to go back and forth. There is no right or wrong way to read a book; the key is to use the time together to co-create relaxation. In other words, it’s not just the actual book, page or images that have the potential to reinforce relaxation skills. The main factor is the relational give and take with the caring adult that can provide leadership to a calm state of mind.

Book review ahead. Look for books that facilitate relaxation moments. Stories that reaffirm acceptance, belonging and significance are obvious choices. However, gauge how your child may respond with a book’s title, theme, pace, illustration style and particular wording. If children have had an uncertain or disappointing history with adults, the emotional intensity should be lower key so as to not overstimulate them because the purpose is to practice relaxation. Try these ideas:

Start with topics that are interesting, but not “busy”. Unless the child is already accustomed to managing behavior during reading, aim first to captivate his or her interest.

Check out parts of a book before actually reading. Look at front and back covers. Discuss some of the characters or places in the book.

Sometimes going through the first time, turning pages and slowly creasing them down as you move through the book can be calming.

Be carefree and have fun while reading. Use inflection, pauses, eye contact and even physical sensations. Change voices for different characters, and you coudl even bounce the knee as the story tells of riding a horse. Find the rhythm. Notice the catch phrases. What meaning does the story have?

Incorporate quips or elements from the story in everyday interactions. Of course “I think I can; I think I can” is a phrase that can be spoken when the book is not open at the moment. Rhymes and cadence can help a child learn to activate the pleasantness in experienced in stories into other areas of life. For example, from the Foot Book by Dr. Seuss, a caregiver can use a phrase to help put on shoes in the morning in a less stressful manner: “Left foot, left foot, left foot, right!” might be just the timing to help with patience to get shoes on in the mornings!

Shiny pages. Magazine subscriptions or junk mail can be valuable. Roaming through the pages and identifying objects, how they may be used and what a child would like to imagine with the pictures and words is helpful to releasing cortisol-suppressing feel-good hormones. Perhaps looking a contiguous two-page picture of the mountains, beach or forest is a good imaginary exercise as well. “I wonder” conversations help a child gain a sense of control about stepping into the future and new possibilities. In the calm of spontaneous exploration, a child can begin to trust the process of discovery without fear of the unwelcomed surprise.

Wordless. A new niche in some children’s books is the element of only illustrations. The purpose is to spur imagination for the story. In addition, the plot is slowly released. Children learn what it is and what might be. The ability to focus in the now, but also anticipate what is coming next is a combination of feeling secure about the now so that with the caregiver we can go into something new. With the distinct presence of the adult, a child can learn to manage tensions in a safe, non-threatening exercise.

Writing your own story. Children grow in their awareness of their life story. Stages along the way of their chapter building, adults can using existing props to help a child narrate their current steps. Much like a scrap book or multi-media conglomeration, a child may use the ongoing contributions to be reflective of their development. However, adults can also write their own story and share it with children. It fosters a sense of distance – both near and far. In particular, this relaxation technique helps build enduring skills for not only hot spots, but allows a child and their adult to rest in the security of a shared life story. 

There is something magical about the effects of music. It enhances our creative expression. This factor is important because some children lose their creative refueling due to trauma or challenges.

Encouraging creative expression through music can help facilitate relaxation. Sometimes, vibrant moves with an air guitar can help release the tension of anger. A slow brush sweep in movement with a particular instrument can dissipate tight feelings when contemplating a decision. A rapid set of dance moves can provoke belly laughter as well as a challenge between left foot and right!

Try these tips to help encourage relaxation through listening to music:

Choose instrumental music. Without words to convey a particular sentiment for the moment, children can enter the musical space and project their own interpretation of the music based on what they need at that time. They can find the humor, sorrow, frustration or confusion in the music – and in themselves. Instrumental music does not verbally suggest the emotion. However, use your discretion when choosing music – consider the pace and pulse of the music. Much like selecting books, a good fit between need and supply is the purpose of this activity. Children benefit from listening to instrumental music by getting the opportunity to determine the meaning of the music.

Listen to current, popular music. Children need their peers to help encourage them to live up to their potential. Children want to follow the supportive leaders in place – including leaders among their peers. Therefore, some of the music in the public environments can be an opportunity to join with others in musical expression. These benefits may not be so obvious to a child, especially an adolescent. Yet, radio and other popular music events in childhood often lead to shared sentiments in a community. Music of this kind can be used for creative expression.

Try a variety of genres. For relaxation purposes, explore music genres with a specific set of criteria to determine the pros and cons of particular pieces of music within genres. For example, children who are sad may be best served with easy listening music. Children can also get good physical activity while dancing along to an upbeat song. Certain musical compositions can work well at bedtime to soothe fears and lift dreams onto clouds. Again, review all choices and find the best-fit selections for your child.

“If you live to be 100, I hope to live to be 100 minus one day, so I never have to live without you.” – Winnie the Pooh

What are your thoughts on living to be 100? I would like to live to be 100, as long as I am healthy and independent. Most of us do not wish to have poor health as we age or have to be dependent on our families for daily needs. You may be wondering how you can live independently to 100. Studies suggest that only about 25% of how long people live is determined by genetics; the other 75% is determined by lifestyle and daily choices. 

In searching for the secrets of those who have lived a long and healthy life, many centenarians (people who are 100 or more years old) share the same behaviors, habits and personal traits. As you read through the list, if you aren’t already practicing one of these tips, you might consider making it part of your healthy lifestyle. Many centenarians:

• Eat a mainly plant-based diet that consists of legumes, whole grains, fruits, vegetables, nuts and seeds.
• Lead an active lifestyle. Engage in regular low intensity physical activity on a daily basis such as walking, working in the garden, chopping wood, mowing the lawn with a push mower and raking leaves.
• Do not smoke.
• Have a clear goal in life – a purpose or reason to get up each day. Continue to learn and educate yourself throughout your life.
• Belong to a strong religious community. The act of worship is a habit that can provide more good years. 
• Have a rich social network of family and friends, which provides opportunity to slow down and can act as a stress reliever. 

Hopefully this information will provide you with food for thought on changes you could make to add years to your life. You have nothing to lose – only time to gain. If you would like more information, bluezones.com can provide additional information on living longer. Here’s to good health for all! 

Most babies will breastfeed until 18 months to 2 years, if allowed to self-wean. There are a few developmental stages at 2 – 4 months and again at 8 – 10 months which where new parents might get the perception that baby doesn’t want to nurse anymore. Around 2 – 4 months, babies discover they are separate from their mother and their vision improves, allowing them to discover other things that can distract them during a feeding session. They are also awake for longer periods at a time. Babies have difficulty multitasking – nursing and watching what is going on around them at the same time. Another time of easy distractibility occurs at 8 – 10 months. Babies at this age may pull off the breast and re-latch several times during a feeding session. 

The breastfeeding session can be a challenge to keep baby at breast long enough to accomplish a feeding. Limiting the distractions can help. Try going to a dark quiet room to breastfeed or try breastfeeding baby when he or she is sleepier. If baby is “too busy” to nurse enough during the day, try offering the breast more often at night or during nap times for a while. Spending more time doing skin to skin exposure or wearing baby in a sling can also help “remind” baby to nurse more often. If baby pulls away, but does not unlatch, be ready to break suction with a finger to prevent damage to the nipple. 

I hope this advice will help you with this potentially frustrating period of breastfeeding so you can continue the nursing relationship until both of you are ready to wean.

For assistance with breastfeeding or questions feel free to contact the Freeman Lactation Office at 417.347.1067.

You may have heard in the news that sitting is the new smoking, as far as an increase in health risks goes. Many of us do a lot of sitting throughout the day – commuting to and from work, sitting at a desk all day and/or sitting on the couch at home. Prolonged sitting can take years off your life. Dr. James Levine, Director of the Mayo Clinic-Arizona State University Obesity Solutions Initiative, studied the adverse effects of our increasingly sedentary lifestyles for years and summed up his findings in two sentences: “Sitting is more dangerous than smoking, kills more people than HIV and is more treacherous than parachuting. We are sitting ourselves to death. “ 

Sitting shortens lives by increasing the risk of obesity, type 2 diabetes, certain types of cancer and heart disease. In addition, exercising later in the day unfortunately doesn’t necessarily undo the negative effects of prolonged sitting. 

You may be wondering what you can do to take some of those years of your life back. Try these tips:

• When possible, opt to climb the stairs instead of taking the elevator
• Walk to your coworker’s desk instead of sending an email or making a phone call
• Plan a walking meeting
• Stretch for a few minutes every few hours
• Wear a pedometer and set a goal of walking 10,000 steps each day
• Take a 10-minute walk break instead of checking your cell phone or personal email

Try one of the above suggestions for three weeks, or until it becomes a lifestyle change. Then, pick another habit and try it for three weeks. Invite your coworkers to do this as well. As you know, being accountable to others for your behavior makes it more likely that the habit will stick. 

Think happy; think healthy!

When you need to cool down, a wading pool just won’t do! The pool metaphor refers to adults in children’s lives, i.e. adults are pools full of sources to share, or provide resources, to children. Compassion satisfaction occurs when a child-serving person’s pool is full, meaning that there is a healthy work-life balance and giving and receiving are integrated while serving. Water coming out of the pool is similar to an adult having positive feelings associated with giving. Water being added to the pool is similar to adults having the input of colleagues, training and/or inspiration. During compassion satisfaction, there is constant water motion.

Often, child-serving adults are aware of their meaningful contributions to children’s lives and the future of society. These adults experience compassion satisfaction when they anticipate and accept the inevitable personal changes that result from doing the important work. And it’s good work! The life of the helper transforms as the lives of others improve. The energy flow that results from helping others can invigorate these adults. Therefore, a person with compassion satisfaction has the confidence to know that he or she makes a difference, looks forward to finding new solutions, feels successful and wants to continue serving. It’s like an internal water hose into the swimming pool that sustains respect and encourages human resiliency. When satisfied helping professionals invest in people, they also invest in themselves!

Compassion satisfaction occurs when water flowing in and out of the pool is in proportion. Water going out may be in the form of effective, time-tested and well-crafted techniques delivered authentically by the helper. Even when the child’s behavior can be challenging, an adult can trust these methods:

• Staying calm
• Not taking things personally
• Tuning into the function of the behavior
• Role-modeling appropriate behavior
• Instructing and building for the child’s future behavior

Consistently using effective techniques builds momentum and confidence, like a hose adding water to the pool. At the compassion satisfaction point along the continuum, the helper invites the swim.

However, without the purposeful movement of water going in and out, the water level of the pool may be full, but stagnant. This point on the continuum is often burnout. Since we are talking about water, some folks also refer to this stage as rust out. Like a pond that has no river feeding it or stream to carry water away, undesirable things can begin to grow inside the stale pool. In other words, the pool is growing slimy green algae instead of being crisp and clean. 

When burnout occurs due to unhappiness in the work itself, it can feel like you don’t have enough resources to get important work done. Burnout could be caused by environment, such as unpleasant noises or sights or space restrictions. Staleness could be due to the repetitive nature of the work, such as similar scenarios, same routines or low rates of effectiveness in change efforts. Burnout can also occur when you feel little connection with others, which may stunt enthusiasm for doing important work helping others. At this point, there is little to no water (resource) movement. Frustration can lead to preoccupation. Mistakes can become more frequent. Therefore, distractions increase while motivations decrease. At the burnout point along the continuum, the helper avoids the swim.

Prevention and intervention strategies for burnout include:

• Use time-tested techniques
• Remember why you do what you do
• Check in with encouraging people who do similar important work
• Take time for self-care
• Have a friend to help track equal in and out flows
• Create flexibility in times/places/cases in which you serve
• Engage regularly in training and/or educational opportunities
• Keep track of the stories that inspire you

We seem to have a code of silence surrounding the topic of mental health. Simply put, mental health is our emotional well-being that affects how we think, feel and act.

We all desire to live full, happy lives with good mental health. However, according to the World Health Organization, only 17% of American adults are considered to be in a state of optimal mental health. The Centers for Disease Control reports that depression is the most common type of mental illness, affecting 26% of the U.S. adult population. By the year 2020, depression will be the second leading cause of disability throughout the world.
Undetected and poorly treated depression can place individuals at risk for suicide. Suicide is a scary word and nobody likes to talk about it either. However, suicide remains a leading cause of death in the U.S., claiming 40,600 lives in 2012. In 2013, 958 Missourians lost their lives to suicide, outnumbering lives lost to homicide and motor vehicle accidents that year.

The good news is that depression can be treated successfully. Unfortunately, many people don’t recognize the symptoms, nor do they seek treatment. We can avert the tragedy of suicide if we can bring ourselves to simply talk about it, recognize the warning signs and learn what resources are available so that life-saving help can be provided when it is needed most.

Warning signs that indicate a need to seek help include:

• Withdrawing from life
• Displaying extreme mood swings
• Sleeping too little or too much
• Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs
• Experiencing any significant losses
• Feeling hopeless
• Feeling one has no reason to live
• Feeling trapped
• Having unbearable emotional pain
• Wanting to die or kill oneself

If you recognize these warning signs, break the code of silence by talking directly and openly about your concerns. Then, connect your loved one, friend or coworker to the support he or she needs to stay safe and get back to traveling on the road of emotional well-being. 

Nationally, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available 24 hours per day at 800.273.8255. Ozark Center, the behavioral health division of Freeman Health System, is a great local resource. Visit ozarkcenter.com to learn about services offered. Additionally, Ozark Center crisis services are available 24 hours per day and are staffed by highly trained mental health professionals. You can reach the Crisis Helpline at 417.347.7720 or 800.247.0661. Ozark Center’s TxtAboutIt program is a secure, anonymous communication service that anyone can begin using by texting REGISTER to 720-7-TXTOZK. The Ozark Center crisis services team offers free depression screenings to adults, youths and children daily – call 417.347.7600 for more information.

Help is readily available. Remember that people do recover from emotional setbacks and depression.  

Many of us tend to wait until the new year to think about getting fit or starting a fitness program. Why not get a jump start this year instead and fall into fitness? Fall is the perfect time of year to begin a fitness regimen – the weather is cooler and the beauty of the changing leaves is the perfect setting for an outdoor workout. Additionally, you’ll enjoy the holidays even more knowing you are going to have additional calorie burned to help offset those holiday treats. It takes approximately one month for a new behavior to become a habit, so follow the tips below to get started moving now.

Determine why you want to get fit
Determine why you want to get fit – your reason will help your decision stick. Maybe you want to lose weight, prepare for a 5K or have more energy. Your “why” will motivate you to stay on track with your plan for the next 30 days.

Enjoy fall weather
The cooler temperatures are a nice change from the heat of the summer. Fall is a perfect time for a hike, bike ride, walk or run. Check out the many local trails in the four state area by visiting livesmartswmo.com/move-more/trails. Let your kids take turns picking out a new trail to visit on the weekends.

Exercise safely 
With the days getting shorter, take precautions to exercise safely in the evenings. Wear reflective clothing, carrying a flashlight and use areas free of traffic such as a trail or school track. 

Dress appropriately
Wear a couple of layers of clothing when exercising during chilly mornings. Also, choose wicking clothing that pulls moisture away from your skin.

Team up for fitness
Accountability helps us follow through on a commitment to exercise. So, get a workout partner and put the dates on your calendar. Treat these appointments like any other daily commitment. Plan outdoor activities on the weekend with your kids or family members that you can look forward to during the week. 

Make a change this fall and start your fitness journey instead of making excuses, such as “I will get fit in the new year.” The 30 days will be up before you know it, and you will have developed some great habits for 2016!

In this blog post, the compassion continuum discussion continues using the pool metaphor. The pool refers to adults in children’s lives, i.e. adults are pools full of sources to share, or provide resources, to children. Hopefully, the water hoses coming into the swimming pool are keeping pace with the amount of water going out due to evaporation, splashing, and filters. High water levels are dependable under these conditions. Leaks in the pool will drain the water level, however. When water loss comes outside the healthy outlets, compassion fatigue is a likely result. While burnout is a work-overload issue, compassion fatigue is an emotion-overload issue. This place along the compassion continuum refers to all the usual routes of water loss and hoses being in operation, but holes are also in the pool. Like little punctures in the pool’s walls, these subtle leaks can be experienced as a constant stream of feelings such a feeling of being overwhelmed due to the emotional nature of the work.

Compassion fatigue occurs when coping skills are exhausted and/or dysfunctional. Coping skills involve mental effort to be aware, tolerate and effectively manage emotions involved with child-serving work. When internal capacity is compromised, the result for the helper is a wide variety of defensive emotional reactions. For example, if a person has difficulty with saying “no” to new requests for help, the workload is not the issue – the issue is emotional stress. A helper may experience feelings of hopelessness he or she applies more effort with little to no changes in circumstances due to situations beyond the helper’s control. 

Prolonged exposure to overwhelming situations can result in a helper adopting a defensive stance. In other words, he or she is in fight, flight or freeze mode in helping efforts. Fight mode can cause a person to be irritable and defensive about preserving the remaining resources available. An example may include a person who avoids situations or complains when receiving requests through the usual “hose out” venues. Yet, since the water is leaking through holes in the side of the pool, resentment may build against the typical giving activities. The helper resists swimming.

Flight mode can include feelings of disconnectedness and/or being “out-of-touch” with the usual helping activity. The helper is hesitant to approach activities out of fear of more water loss. He or she may feel that helping does not have a good cost-benefit ratio. The helper may ask him or herself, “Why bother?” The helper is reluctant to swim.

During freeze mode, a helper may be bogged down and thus not able to participate in the activities fully. An example may include a person who has difficulty actively listening, empathic highlights, case conceptualization or determining best-fit technologies or procedures. People who are experiencing compassion fatigue may also be identified by frequent absenteeism – or worse, presenteeism – in which they are physically present but emotionally absent. The helper is weary and paralyzed from swimming.

Regardless of the defensive posture above, the results are similar: the helper does not engage in the swim.

Signs of compassion fatigue:

• Physical ailments such increased sickness and/or exhaustion 
• Difficulty with concentration, morale, motivation
• Reduced ability to feel sympathy and empathy
• Angry, cynical, irritable or out-of-proportion reactions to events 
• Increased use of alcohol and drugs
• Loss of healthy client boundaries and motivation to help 
• Decreased sense of enjoyment
• Increased isolation
• Disruption to world view, heightened anxiety or irrational fears
• Intrusive imagery or dissociation
• Hypersensitivity or Insensitivity to emotional material
• Difficulty separating work life from personal life
• Impaired ability to make decisions and care for clients
• Contributing to a toxic interpersonal environment

Travelling when you have diabetes can pose some challenges; however with proper planning, your trips will be fun and worry-free.

A change in your normal routine may increase your risk of high or low blood sugar. Often, when you are traveling, you are walking more. On the other hand, you may be eating more unfamiliar foods that you are not able to count as easily into your meal plan. Keeping your meter and extra strips with you will help you closely monitor your blood sugar. Certainly, if you are not feeling well, you should check your blood sugar.

Make sure to bring nonperishable snacks, such as  glucose tablets and juice boxes, in case meals are delayed. Keeping these snacks close by will make it easier to treat low blood sugar. If your blood sugar has dropped to less than 70 mg/dL, you’ll need to consume a fast acting carbohydrate such as the glucose tablets or juice mentioned above.

If you are going to be gone on an overnight trip, make sure to bring extra medication or emergency prescriptions in case you are delayed getting back home. An insurance card and emergency contact phone numbers will help if you run into any medical emergency along the way. If traveling by air, ask your physician for a note to help you get diabetes supplies through security at the airport. Also, research where to find medical care in the area can be helpful. Other supplies that are helpful to have with you while traveling include: extra batteries, cell phone, medical alert bracelet, waterproof insulated bag or cooler for insulin, comfortable shoes and an extra pair of socks.

Most of all, remember that getting away from your day-to-day routine should be fun and enjoyable!